Do you ever get news that makes you sick to your stomach? You know, you get word of whatever it is and instantly your stomach is tight in knots and you feel like if you acknowledge it too much you might just throw up? I got that kind of message today. Instantly, I noticed the knots and sick-to-my stomach sensation. But then I took a step back and told myself I wasn't going to go there. I was NOT going to give in to the fear that was physically gripping me. So I held it at bay. The funny thing is, I've already given this whole issue over to God and laid it before him that no matter what the outcome, it is his resource and his to guide and lead. We will follow no matter where he leads with this. I did that last summer and again this fall. And quite honestly, I've been telling people this the last few months whenever anyone asks about this particular area. And then, today, when reality punched me square in the stomach I wanted to throw up. Or cry. But I chose to exercise power over fear. After all, fear is a tool of the enemy. Fear is NOT of God (well unless it's fear of God, but that's a different post!). If it's not from God then it's from the enemy-the Father of Lies the Bible calls Satan. Today, I chose to not listen to that liar. I chose to not give even a teeny tiny foothold to that fear that instantly descended right into my gut. In my head it's easy to start planning-start going over all the logistics needed to take care of the situation. I can easily play out all the various scenarios (like 15) within 2 minutes, noting what steps I need to take immediately to set up any one of them. I want to go into research mode and find out what logically makes the most sense for our family. I want to worry and stress and be afraid of the situation. Of people, of our culture, of a thing. AND I CHOSE NOT TO! See, as soon as I pushed those thoughts of fear away, it is not like all my cares vanished and it was a bright sunshiny day with no worries. Nope, that's not how the enemy works. He does NOT give up that easily. The fear is there. I can taste it, feel it just beyond reach. I know if I even give it a momentary thought I will drown in it. And I'm not a sinker. I'm a swimmer. A fighter. But tonight I'm doing none of these things. See, a friend posted a verse this week that I've been meditating on. It's Exodus 14:14 and it says "The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still." Moses has just brought the Israelites out of their bondage and slavery to the Egyptians. And where they were rejoicing mightily hours earlier, now they are panicking and sick to their stomachs with fear over their former captors chasing them down. They are trapped between them and the Sea. Moses tells them not to be afraid and to sand firm and see the deliverance God is bringing them that day. This passage has been on my heart the last few days a lot and I have been praying asking God to help me wait on him. Asking him to help me be still and let him fight for me. Then I got the message today and I almost surged forward into battle myself. But as I realized fear was motivating that I cast it aside and refuse to let it control me. Tonight I'm still. We're still. We are entering battle, but in a much different way than facing the problem head on. We are going to our knees to be still before the Lord. To plead with him to show us what to do and to wait on him to tell us to step out into the sea. No matter the outcome here on earth of this situation, I know that we will be victorious if we are still and wait on the Lord and follow him and not fear.
What do you need to be still before the Lord about?
Carolyn & (sometimes) Ty